When something as unpredictable and devastating as a pandemic sweeps the world, it leaves scars so deep it’s impossible to blot out. As I write, I can feel the raw sting of pain from my own scars, having recently lost a loved one to the cold, cruel latches of Covid-19. It’s hard.

If you’ve been here, as I suspect some of you have, you know that once the shadow of grief has lifted, you’re left with only two choices, to either die on the hill of pain, reminiscing the good old days or, muster every ounce of strength and take at least one step away from the darkness and face the light.

Both of these sucks. But everything in life boils down to a fork on the road. Do you turn left or right?

Eventually, you’ve got to make a choice, no matter how painful. And if you make the same choice as I have (more on that in a moment), you start to sense a new version of yourself pushing through the cracks like a blade of grass through the cement. With it, you become armed with lessons you’d otherwise not learn had grief not interrupted your life’s rhythm.

The point of this piece is to expose all the leafy thoughts that have been rustling in my head for the past one and half years in the hope that they can inspire you to explore how your own grief has changed you if you haven’t recognized it yet. Hopefully, my sorrow can be the pebble that will trigger the ripple you need to discover yourself.

Here’s what I’ve learned since Covid-19 hit.